15th December 2018:
I am ashamed to tell you all that today, when I had my hair cut, it was for the first time this year. My hair was very long, past my shoulders and without Kate Middleton’s hairdresser on hand, it didn’t look very Kate esque. So I booked in with Jon at Phillip Helliar in Cambridge and shuffled in, to beg for help with a matted patch that is always unhappy – it’s at the point where I have tied my hair back and done a fold over knot so yes, it was rather matted. We agreed that my hair needed quite a bit taking off and so he pulled it together at the back and made a big cut. I breathed deeply as he did.
We talked of course, about the loss of my Dad, how my Mum is doing, how things are with Hope House Press and about Lovely Bloke – as it was he who introduced me to Jon a hundred years ago when I moved to Cambridge. In fact, it was a smoothed out version of this that I first had at Philip Helliar! I’ve now gone for a bob which is more choppy. It’s easy to manage and only needs texturiser. I bought myself a hairdryer – well, Father Christmas did, as I’ve not had a new hairdryer in 20 years – I got my last one the year I finished University. And now I’m doing the ‘I want to try doing my own hair – but don’t want to’ all at the same time!
I think it was time for a change. I cried in the chair. Jon cried with me. I feel that I held on to my hair, in the state that it was. I don’t think it’s the grieving. Maybe it is? I don’t know. But I know I feel better for having it all cut off and starting afresh. We don’t have to wait for the new year to make changes – I’ve written about that before. Changes can be at any point. It doesn’t matter where we are. We just have to start.